It is interesting that yesterday I decided I would dedicate Fridays to why I love being a mom. Today I took my 17 month old to a nearby duck pond. We had a lot of fun feeding the ducks, but as we were getting ready to go, she started throwing a tantrum. A crazy, insane, throw my body into violent convulsions type of tantrum. She screamed and jerked the entire way home. She screamed louder if I tried to talk to her, distract her, offer her a graham cracker, etc... 25 minutes later we were home, and the tantrum continued. I finally turned on Signing Time, which sort of helped, then gave her some grapes.
I still have no idea what was wrong. But what I do know is that I sure was at my wits end about what to do with the dear little thing. I kept my cool for the most part, it is a good thing we were outside, because I probably would have yelled at her to knock it off if we had been inside.
Am I still grateful to be a mom? Yes. I definitely am. Now she is napping, and reflecting on the prayers I said to know what to do, I'm not sure that they were specifically answered, but at least Heavenly Father helped me to keep my cool. That is a pretty big miracle.
Sometimes I just need to remember this thought from Jeffrey R Holland, a leader of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.
"You are doing God's work. You are doing it wonderfully well. He is blessing you, and He will bless you, even--no, especially--when your days and your nights may be most challenging. Like the woman who anonymously, meekly, perhaps even with hesitation and some embarrassment, fought her way thought the crowd just to touch the hem of the Master's garment, so Christ will say to the woman who worry and wonder and week over their responsibilities as mothers, 'Daughter, be of good comfort; thy faith hath made thee whole.' And it will make your children whole as well" ("Because She is a Mother," 37).